Question Time: Hetalia
by Kawaii Seishin
Summary: Ask questions to the memebers of the Axis or Allies! Includes N. Italy, Germany, Japan, America, England, France, China, and Russia. T for possible themes and Iggy's potty mouth
1. Introduction!

**Ello'**

**It is me, Kawaii Seishin, giving you all a heads up on this. Any parrings are accepted (Hetro, Yaoi or Yuri), you can ask any questions to The Axis or The Allies, but please, no swearing (unless you're writing to Iggy). Enjoy!**

_**-x-**_

Ve~ Hello

Germany said to write an introduction to get people to write to me so...here it is: Pasta, Pasta, Pasta, Pasta, Germany, pasta, pasta, pasta, avoiding England, pasta, pasta, pasta.

N. Italy

PS: Oh! Do you wanna hear my song? ~~Pasta Pasta L-O-V-E Pasta Pasta~~

_**-x-**_

To: Who-ever-is-reading-this,

My name is Germany, and you must only call me by so. Ask me anything relating to my country, my culture, the nations who stalk me, ect.

Ja,

Germany

_**-x-**_

Dear [Insert Name Here],

You may call me Japan, and it is a pleasure to be writing this letter to you. Please, you have my permission to ask me anything (execpt my book collections).

I Hope You Shall Respond,

Japan

_**-x-**_

Yo!

This is the awesome and super cool hero, America, writing to all of you! Yeah! Anyway, since I am too amazing for my own good, I'm gonna share it with all of you other countries and their citizens! Write to me and not England!

Hero America

_**-x-**_

Hello, who-ever-the-hell-is-reading-this-sh**,

I am England, the only gentleman in the rugged allies. Write to me, as long as you use the Queen's grammar and you are NOT AMERICA, FRANCE, OR GERMANY.

Other than that I hope to hear from you,

England

_**-x-**_

_Bonjour,_

_Mon nom est Papa France, and I am here to help countries and humans in the art of love. Write to me if you have questions about Love or anything else, le me know. (Hon hon hon~)_

_With Love,_

_Papa France_

**_-x-_**

Ni Hao! :D

I'm China. Send me letters please. I am bored-aru. :S

This has been China :D

**_-x-_**

I am Russia

I want China

If you have any information on China, give it to me, da?

Russia

~Kolkolkol


	2. MiyuiChan's QA

_**-x-**_

**Miyui-Chan** said:

_Ah I feel special for being the first one to write! I`ll try to make this brief ( Yea right. ) To England: We all know your have a dark side , Have you done anything well . . . odd? What was it like to be back in your ol` days? how come you have no friends? To Russia: Would you marry Ukraine? What about America? To Germany: How come Prussia is so awesome? To Italy: How come your so cute? To America: What do you think about Russia? What do you think about Canada? And Germany? To CHina: How often do people confuse you with a for woman? What do you think about England? France: Did you ever cut your hair? That`s all for now! ( Sorry for so many questions!_

**_-x-_**

England: How dare you accuse me of having a dark side! No, no, no, you ninny writer! _*shifty eyes*_ No, no, no! You son of a...I'm sorry, I lost myself for a minute. Anyway, would you mind me not asking that question? Thank you. As for your question what was it like in my old days, well, for awhile I was indeed, the envy of the word-

France: Hon hon hon~ I cannot remember that, England.

England: Shut up, you wine bastard.

France: _*smiles*_

England: As I was saying, yes I was the envy of the world in the Middle ages. I had the most high-tech appliances, like plumbing.

America: Uh, dude, throwing your crud out the window is not 'high tech'.

England: _*angry glare* _For your final question...I do have friends! I have many friends, actually! Like...uh...um...uh...Kylie?

France: Who is this 'Kylie' and can I sleep with her, _oui_?

America: Stupid France! England has no friends!

England: America...

America: _*eats a hamburger*_

England: You know what? F*** this s***! I'm going to go eat a f****** scone!

**-x-**

Russia: No, I love my sister Ukraine to much to marry her. I don't believe in incest.

Belarus: That's not what you said when we-

Russia: Nyet! Nyet! *trembles* We never did anything! Nyet! Nyet!

Belarus: Hehe...marry me...we already-

Ukraine: Whyyy dooo youuu haattee meee, Russssiiaa?

Belerus: Marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me,...

Russia: *hides behind China*

China: Why me-aru?

Ukraine: Whhyyyy?

America:_ *bursts into room*_ YO, what's going on here? _*looks at Belarus, Russia, and Ukraine and Miyui-Chan's letter* _**What about America?**...Russia, what the heck is this?

Russia: My...letter...

America: If you say what's you're really thinking, I swear I'll castrate you.

Russia: Oh, why? That wouldn't be a benefit to yo-

Belarus: Marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me,...

**_-x-_**

Germany: Why do I think Prussia is so awesome? I actually don't think he's as awesome as he says he is...but the one awesome thing about him is that he can chug Japan's weight in bier.

Prussia: Dude! Didja know that the awesome me broke my awesome record.

Germany: Ja?

Prussia: No...it just sounded awesome when I said that.

**_-x-_**

Italy: Ve~ I'm cute? Yay! Is that why Germany turns red when ever he sees me naked? Big Brother said that was because Germany was always angry. Oh heehee~ I know what I'm going to do for Germany's birthday~

**_-x-_**

America: Okay, dude, one: Russia's freaky as hell.

Russia: _*stares at him from America's window*_

America: Two, what's a Canada?

Canada: I'm Canada. _*Gets sit on by Russia*_ Ow...

America: Three, Germany is a fun-killer. That's fun-killer spelled like F-U-N-K-I-L-L-E-R, cause he's one. The only one Germany even likes is North Italy. Cause he's a fun-killer.

**_-x-_**

China: Oh...this is very embarasing to answer-aru, but..._*sighs*_...two thousand five-hundred, sixty-eight times.

Random guy: _*to his friend*_ Hey, let's go pick up that hot chick over there. _*points to China*_

China: Aru...two thousand five hundred, sixty nine times. Anway, England? Really, England? _*shivers*_ I'm terified of him. He's mean! But...I'd rather face him than...Russia. _*shivers*_

_**-x-**_

France: No, mon amour, I have never cut my hair.

England: Don't lie, you wine-sucking ninny.

France: How am I lying? Hon hon hon~

England: _*shows France the sissiors*_ Starting now, you are..._*evil look*_

France: Nooooooonnnnnn!_ *runs away with England chasing him, murmuring some spell...*_

**_-x-_**

**_Arigato for your questions Miyui-Chan! They all enjoyed them, one way or another!_**


	3. Lady of Dark's QA

**Sorry for making this one short...i just wanted to update really badly **

_**-x-**_

**Lady of Dark** said:

_This sounds like fun!_

_Dear England,_

_Were you truly married to her royal highness the late Queen Elizabeth I? What was your opinion of King Henry VII's many wives?_

_Dear Japan,_

_How are you and the rest of the Asian countries getting along lately? Also, seeing as the only question you said you wouldn't answer was about your book collection how about this: With who did you have your first romantic relationship with? I assume you'll keep your word?_

_Dear America,_

_How does it feel going from country of thirteen states to a country of fifty states?_

_**-x-**_

England: Oh, Eliza? She was such a sweet heart and I miss her dearly. *sad face* I hate to admit it, but I did have an affair with her-

China: Pardon my English, but isn't an affair supposed to be consensual?

America: Yeah, England! As is _Both People Want to Do It_!

England: That's what I ment! Yeah we-

France: But I recall you telling me that you-

England: God no! Dear God, no, no! I would never!

China: But you told him

England: When have I ever told France the truth?

France: So you mean all those insults are just ways to get my attention? Hon hon hon~ England, I knew you've had feelings for me, but now I know you're in love with _moi_.

England: F*** you, France. F*** you.

France: Oh, that's your job *wiggles eyebrows*

England: Since it appears I'm soon going to be abducted by France, I'll answer your question about Henry VII. I do believe that he was an arse for having that many wives and either divorcing or beheading them.

Spain: Wait, England, didn't you suggest the idea of multiple wives to him?

England: Shut up, Spain! Don't make me send my armada back on you.

Spain: Eeep! *hides behind Romano* Save me, Tomato!

S. Italy: You just killed your chanced of that, Bastard. *Walks off*

England: *disappears*

China: France strikes again!

**_-x-_**

Japan: Everyone is doing fine, thank you for asking...Oh, dear. I am a Japanese man, so yes, I keep my word. My first romantic relationship was with...Hungary.

Everyone: What?

Japan: Well...we're both yaoi and yuri fans, and we met at a convention, but we didn't know it was each other...and one thing led to another.

Everyone: What?

Japan: But we broke up a few centuries back, not to long ago...

Everyone: What?

Japan: If you stop saying 'what', I'll tell you something about my book collection.

Everyone:...

Japan: Okay...*sad face then devious face* In my closet, there's more yaoi than on the internet hentai sites. I also get a couple from our group to model for most of them...

Everyone: Who?

Japan: *smiles* I said one thing, but I told two. Your welcome.

Everyone: Germany is rubbing off on you, Japan...

Japan: *gets scared*

**_-x-_**

America: Dude! It feels totally epic! I mean, I was so freaking tiny, but then BAM! I'm bigger than England! It feels great to be a big hero, man. XD-That's my epic/happy face!

-x-

Kawaii: Thanks everyone! XD

America: Kawaii! You stole my face XC

Kawaii: XDDDD


	4. Keidus's QA

**Yaayy a new one! :D**

_**-x-**_

**Keidus **said:

_Oh, I have got to do this :D_

England: As an English gal, I love English food. Which is/are your favourite foods? Sausage casserole is my fav and the scones. English food beats French food anyday, right? :)

France and Usa: Ok, so which of you own Arthur? Personally I think you do, Francis, but I'm not sure. Please tell me? (and pictures ;))

Spain: In three words, describe how you feel about Lovi :)

Romano: ^ same but for Toni :)

Prussia: How much do you love Roddy?

_**-x-**_

England: Finally! Someone who appriciates good quality food! :D I love all English food, but my abusloute favorite are my scones! Yummy!

America: *shoves England out of the way* I hate to break it to you, Keidus, but you're insane! His food tastes like ass and anyones's crazy to think other wise.

England: F***ing Move it! *Pushes America away* As I was saying, yes, English food kicks French food's arse.

America: But it still tastes like it!

**_-x-_**

France: Ohonhon~ Yes, this...competition...has been on everyone's minds...but, honestly, he's mine. ;)

America: WTF? NO! HE IS NOT YOURS! XC

France: Well you should of seen him in bed last night...*smirks* He was yelling 'Francis...take me!' and mewling everytime I-

America: Shut up! He did it with me when I was his colony! And all last week before he left!

France: And I did it with him when he was mine! Oh...so now Arthur's screwing randomly? I must of taught him well. ;)

America: You bastard! *Punches France*

France: *Punches back...a fight starts*

Everyone: Fight! Fight! Fight!

Japan: *Secretly sends Keidus coppies of photos he's collected* Your welcome, Keidus-san.

England: *Overhears everything and emos in a corrner* o.o

**_-x-_**

Spain: Hehehe~ _Mi tomate bonito_...he is my sky and world! My love of my life, I can't choose a mere three words for him!

Prussia: Just say it already!

Spain: *pouts* Fine. Too me, he is _mi Sol, mi Viva_, and _mi Amor_.

Prussia: Hey! Mi is a word!

Spain: Geez! Fine! _Sol, Viva, Amor._ But he's still mine :3 *drools*

S. Italy: *Walks in and reads letter* Whatever...Bastard, tomato-hog, and...and...*mutters*

Spain: I didn't hear you...

Prussia: Neither did I...

S. Italy: What the hell? You guys are here! GET OUT!

Prussia: C'mon Gilbird...lets go harass Hungary. *Leaves*

Spain: Please, tell me..._mi amor_...*purrs*

S. Italy: Fine...Bastard, tomato-hog, and...and...and...mi amor...*blushes and runs out* BASTARD!

Spain: Oh I know what we're doing tonight! *follows trying not to get a nosebleed*

_**-x-**_

Prussia: Oh...I love Roddy so much, that the next time I see him...I'll punch his lights out.

Austria: *walks in and gets punched hard* You...*growls*...I love you too, Gilly...so much that I could strangle you and laugh at the same time.

Prussia: Oh sh-

Austria: *chases Prussia around the room* Get back here you sissy!

Prussia: Wait...your not Roddy! *Pulls mask of Roddy's face* OH MY AWESOMENESS IT'S HUNGARY!

Hungary: THIS IS WHAT YOU GET FOR HARASSING ME AND RODDY FOR THE PAST FIVE CENTURIES! *chases Prussia with a frying pan*

Prussia: This shouldn't be happening to the Awesome me...*KO'ed by Frying Pan*

_**-x-**_

**Oh, Francis. Alred will win the battle, but you will win the war! xD...If you want, Keidus, I'll try to get Japan to send the photos of Spain's and S. Italy's...activites...:D**

**Thanks for the letter! **


End file.
